Go Away, Gold!
by jayellex
Summary: No matter what he does, Emerald just can't seem to show Crystal that Gold is not right for her. Maybe Blue, self-proclaimed queen of pranks and tricks, can help him...?


**AN: Unfortunately, as of now, until I don't know when, this story is on an extremely extended hiatus. More on my profile. Super sorry! ;-;**

* * *

"I hate Gold-san."

Silver looked up from the thick book he was reading to see a seething child in front of him. The child's arms were crossed, the long sleeves nearly reaching the floor. The child was just about eye-level with him, despite the fact that Silver was sitting down. Angry green eyes sparkled at him.

"And you're telling this to me because…?"

"'Cause I know you don't care, Silver-san. And if you don't care, then you probably won't tell Gold-san."

Silver leaned back and continued to read his book. "Fair enough. Go on."

"I honestly don't understand what big sis sees in him. I mean, come on! They're like, polar opposites! He's loud, annoying, irresponsible, and he's always looking at other girls! Not to mention selfish and greedy, and a gambler!"

"I heard that Gold has calmed down recently, and started being a little more serious. How do you know that Crys likes Gold, anyway, Emerald?"

Emerald looked up in surprise. That was _so_ not Silver-san's voice.

A tall brunette walked into the room, and settled daintily onto the couch next to Silver. She was wearing a simple black dress, but her azure eyes shone with mischief.

"'Cause she told me so, Blue-san."

Blue smiled. "Well, sometimes good girls like bad boys," she said, winking at Silver, who blushed but showed no other indication that he had noticed.

"But Gold's just so… agh!" Emerald scowled, and the bright green jewel on his forehead seemed to glitter as if agreeing with him. "I've tried to talk to big sis so many times! I tried to show her what an idiot Gold-san is! But no matter what I do, she won't listen! She doesn't even seem to get angry anymore when he calls her 'Super Serious Gal'!" He was whining now.

"Maybe she likes being called that." Blue suggested with a grin.

Emerald looked at her blankly.

Blue sighed. "Why do you care so much, Emerald?"

"'Cause I care about big sis! I don't want to see her end up with someone like Gold-san and have her heart broken! She deserves better after everything she's done! She can't possibly really like him!" He stomped his feet, nearly losing his balance and falling over in the process.

"You never know," Blue singsonged. "That's just how love works."

Emerald contemplated this briefly before announcing, "Love is stupid."

* * *

"What are you doing?"

"Trying to think of more ways to prove to big sis that Gold-san is wrong for her." Emerald was sprawled on his bed with a large board in front of him. On it, he had tacked pictures of his previous failed attempts and written notes everywhere in an almost illegible scribble. He also had diagrams set up.

"Ooh! Pranks and tricks? Count me in!" Blue clapped her hands in glee and jumped up and down.

"Uh… no thanks Blue-san. I prefer to do things by myself."

"If you don't let me I'll tell Crystal and Gold what you're planning. Besides, though you may be a master of battles, you need help from the queen of mischief right here!" she winked.

Emerald had no choice.

"Girls are weird."

* * *

"Are you sure this will work?"

"Trust me. I _am _the queen of pranks and tricks."

Emerald sighed. He had his doubts. He didn't see how this plan would let big sis see how awful Gold-san was, but maybe that was just him. It was true that he wasn't great with planning things like this. Although, he had expected something a bit more elaborate from Blue-san. Anyway, big sis was always telling him to be more trusting.

He and Blue were both hiding in the trees of the forest near Cherrygrove City. Blue was swinging her legs and humming a song in her tree, a little ways away from him, but Emerald was focused and silent.

Gold and Crystal should be coming any moment. Blue had overheard that they were going to have a picnic in this very spot at five o'clock sharp. When the time was right, Emerald would—

"Shh! They're coming!" Blue whispered, pulling her legs up and peering at the two teens through the leaves.

Gold was wearing a simple black tee and shorts. His spiky hair was somewhat tamed by his usual hat and goggles. Crystal had a pretty blue t-shirt on with a paler blue sweater on top. Her blue hair was let down, instead of up in their usual pigtails. She was laughing at something that Gold had said.

Emerald wanted to die. He could not stand hearing big sis giggling and talking with that guy. What was worse was that they did not and _could not_ know he was in the tree a few feet away, so he had to keep his mouth shut.

Too bad he couldn't shut his ears too.

* * *

While Emerald sat in his tree, he couldn't help but think about this plan. Even if it went as planned, how was this supposed to help? No matter how he thought about it, Emerald just could not figure out how this would benefit him at all. How was big sis supposed to see Gold-san's ineptitude like this? Emerald couldn't help but feel that maybe, _just maybe,_ Blue-san was...

Suddenly, Emerald heard a sound and was jarred out of his thoughts. He immediately recognized it as the signal he and Blue-san had agreed on—a high, long whistle, followed by two low and short ones. Emerald thought it was silly and way to obvious, but Blue-san was right—those two were too busy talking to notice. It made him sick.

He shot out his extendable arm and knocked over the jar of honey Blue had set up. In an instant, Emerald could hear their shrieks of surprise. Emerald winced. He hated doing that to big sis, but Blue-san had insisted, albeit while giggling at something. And she _was_ the queen of tricks and pranks, after all.

_Bzzzzz. Bzzzzz. _

Emerald looked down. Hordes of bug Pokemon were flying, crawling towards Gold and Crystal, attracted by the sweet, sweet, smell. He could see Heracross, Spinaraks, Ledybas, and more.

Emerald tensed up. He was having doubts again.

Turns out he didn't need to though.

* * *

"Explotaro! Flamethrower!"

A wall of fire suddenly surrounded both Gold and Crystal. When the fire died down, Emerald saw that Gold had taken out his Typhlosion. The large Pokemon stood on two legs and had a smug look on its face, a trail of smoke coming out of its mouth from the recent attack. Emerald scowled. He had to admit though, his senior was pretty good. He managed to scare all the Pokemon off, but not damage anyone or their surroundings.

Crystal's eyes were wide with surprise, her pretty sweater slightly burned.

Emerald held his breath. He was pretty sure that was her favorite sweater.

How would the two respond?

Crystal giggled and clapped.

Gold smiled and laughed.

Emerald seethed and fumed.

* * *

"You said it would work. If anything, they're even closer now cause Gold-san saved them or whatever!" Emerald flopped facedown onto the couch, but was careful not to ruin his hair. It took a lot of work in the mornings. Not to mention _a lot_ of gel.

After the incident, the Gold and Crystal had settled down and had their picnic, as if nothing had happened. Emerald thought that at some point Gold-san had put his arm around big sis, but wasn't sure since he had refused to look. All the while Blue-san had been giggling and muttering something about "adorable," and "sweet," and "perfect together." Emerald thought he had seen a camera in her purse. He groaned at the thought and looked up at Blue-san, who was busy fixing her make-up.

Blue looked up and smiled. She waggled a finger at him, before picking up her hot pink cell phone and putting it to her ear.

"Well, I have another plan."

_Was that a ghost of a smirk right there?_

* * *

**Ah! I haven't updated in so long... sorry ;-;**

**I realize this isn't my _best_ work, but you'll have to deal with it for now. :P**

**It's going to be pretty short, maybe three or four chapters.**

**Thank you to everyone who favorited of reviewed my previous stories :)**

**Reviews would be loved :D**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Pokemon, or the picture. I do not know who the artist is. If the artist should not want me to use the picture, just tell me and I will take it down.**


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